Netcorp: A Live Messenger Thriller [Archive] - Team17 Forum

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Paul.Power
30 Nov 2008, 01:57
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (00:49):
The time was 00:48. It was late, but I was still up. Couldn't sleep. Thoughts of the world wide web conspiracy had been burrowing away at the back of my mind and it was time to go straight to the source. I picked up my MSN communications device and dialed Paul.Power.
Paul.Power says (00:50):
dot Power here
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (00:50):
This is Mad. What's your status?
Paul.Power says (00:51):
A cold virus has breached my sinuses for the second time in two months. I suspect enemy action
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (00:53):
I wouldn't put it past them. We know Netcorp will do anything to find out that formula. And the threat of a runny nose is enough to break many a man.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (00:54):
Hang in there.
Paul.Power says (00:55):
Will do. Name, rank and serial number, that's all they'll get out of me
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (00:57):
What is your rank now, anyway? Last I heard you were going for that Scientific Advisor job. Any luck there?
Paul.Power says (00:58):
As it happens, yes. Netcorp may have agents everywhere, but my boss is a good man and he wouldn't let them sabotage my application.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:02):
Good to know that O'Roffle's still as incorruptible as ever. I worked with him on the Lolcat investigation, a few years back.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:03):
We actually shut it down for a couple of months but, with Netcorp on their side, the cat came back.
Paul.Power says (01:03):
But at least it wasn't the very next day.
Paul.Power says (01:03):
We must take our victories where we can, it seems
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:04):
Seems these days those victories are getting fewer and fewer.
Paul.Power says (01:06):
We have to keep up the fight, though. As the saying goes, it's always darkest before dawn. I believe that one day we will find Netcorp's weak link.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:06):
I thought that was Robinson but I haven't seen her around in weeks.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:07):
I guess they got to her, first
Paul.Power says (01:08):
Possibly. But there are more potential holes in Netcorp than you might think. I'm currently working on reverse-engineering some of their technology. It's slow going, but I think I'm getting somewhere
Paul.Power says (01:08):
I suspect this is why Netcorp sent out that cold virus.
Paul.Power says (01:09):
I mean, yes, the formula is important, but *this*...
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:09):
Paul.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:09):
The line was dead.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:10):
I attempted to redial, hoping it was nothing more serious than a faulty system.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:10):
You never can be too sure nowadays.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:11):
<THIS CALL IS BEING DIVERTED BY NETCORP>
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants was added to this conversation. Handwriting is no longer supported because not all participants can view handwritten messages. Handwritten messages will be sent as text.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:11):
One of Netcorp's agents, SupSuper appeared on the screen. This was more serious than I'd thought.
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:12):
how are you gentlemen
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:12):
Super! I suppose you're the one responsible for infecting Power with the cold virus?
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:13):
but of course. and you'll be next if you try to cross my path again!
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:14):
I could tell by his face, he wasn't bluffing. It was time to try a different approach.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:14):
You know, if you're looking for the formula, you're wasting your time.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:14):
I already sold it to the Interwebs Corporation.
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:15):
is that so? for you see, i have the interwebs corporation leader right here
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:15):
PAUL?!
Paul.Power says (01:15):
It's a trap! Don't listen to him Mad!
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:16):
you've got one hour to give me the formula, or the beard gets it
Paul.Power says (01:16):
Mad: Code Green Four Pi
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:16):
I'm on it.
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:17):
alright men, at your posts. we've got visitors tonight... and we want them to feel welcome
Paul.Power says (01:18):
Scientific Advisor Paul Varley, 4291720.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:19):
I raced down the street towards the secret location where I kept all the top-secret devices and files I'd retrieved from cases, over the years
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:19):
I just prayed I wasn't too late...
Paul.Power says (01:20):
Oh wait, I mean dot Power
Paul.Power says (01:21):
What a fool I am! I gave away my true identity!
Paul.Power says (01:21):
Mad will never forgive me
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:21):
Okay, I'm back
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:21):
What did I miss?
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:22):
Power, still keeping incognito, I hope?
Paul.Power says (01:22):
*ahem* Scientific Advisor Paul dot Power, 4291720
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:22):
Good man.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:23):
Now, Super, let him go. I've got the formula and I'm not afraid to use it.
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:23):
poppycock! nobody knows how to use the formula but me. and unlike every other villain, i'm not telling you
Paul.Power says (01:23):
That's where you're wrong, Super!
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:24):
what? it can't be!
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:24):
Don't say I didn't warn you
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:24):
alright, i'm done playing nice. men, i want that formula! leave nobody behind!
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:25):
Paul, did you get the formula. Only you know how to use it.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:25):
Wait a second...
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:25):
Uh-oh
Paul.Power says (01:25):
Mad: all you need to do is enter the following passcode: 124... *transmission ends*
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:25):
well done men. and now, with the formula in my hands...
Paul.Power says (01:25):
hey wait what
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:25):
i shall rule the world!
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:25):
Yes, looks like Sup won
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:25):
*winks at Paul*
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:26):
alright man, commence operation...
Paul.Power says (01:26):
Oh yes, he definitely won
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:26):
LOL SPID'R? AAAAAAARGH, i'm sick of your dirty tricks, mad! this ends now!
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:27):
You're too late. I already sent the real formula to Power!
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:27):
And it has the correct number of legs too!
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:28):
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Paul.Power says (01:28):
Okay, all I need to do is... tum te tum... okay, now give me ten minutes while this thing activates
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:29):
Activates... wait... you did set it to just blow up Netcorp's HQ first, didn't you?
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:29):
The default is "Entire world except Netcorp"
Paul.Power says (01:29):
oh... dear.
Paul.Power says (01:29):
Given me ten minutes while I stop this activating
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:30):
Super, you know the secret deactivation codes, you've got to help us!
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:30):
and what makes you think i would?
Paul.Power says (01:31):
... I could probably work them out. But it would take at least eleven minutes
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:31):
Oh, the horrible irony!
Paul.Power says (01:31):
Speaking of which, seven minutes now
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:31):
goodbye forever, mad! *laughs manically*
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:32):
Come on, Super. You may be vice-chairman of the most evil corporation ever, but you're not a monster!
Paul.Power says (01:32):
Mad: when I was in training, there was something you and O'Roffle always said to do in a tight spot
Paul.Power says (01:32):
Improvise
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:32):
Wait... no, Power. What are you doing?!
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:32):
There's still time!
Paul.Power says (01:33):
No there isn't. If I can reverse the polarity of the electron flow, I can turn this thing around and blow up Netcorp instead
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:34):
Taking you with it!
Paul.Power says (01:35):
If it saves the world and eliminates NetCorp, that's a price I'm willing to pay. Well, unless you *do* manage to get Super to cough up the codes first. I'll try and delay until the last possible moment
Paul.Power says (01:35):
Incidentally, three minutes
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:36):
Come on, Super. You're in the Netcorp building. Even you're not insane enough to destroy yourself!
Paul.Power says (01:36):
Two minutes
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:37):
If not for yourself, do it for your son... SupSuperboy
Paul.Power says (01:38):
Less than a minute, Mad
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:38):
Oh, damn it. I really didn't want to have to do this.
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:38):
SupSuperboy? no, it can't be! i thought he was dead years ago! that's what turned me into an evil vice-president!
Paul.Power says (01:38):
Twenty seconds...
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:38):
fine, the code is Alpha Beta 666 Stuff
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:39):
He's alive, Super. And you can see him. If you just give peace a chance.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:39):
Oh, right. You did
Paul.Power says (01:39):
type type type type type
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:39):
Did it work?
Paul.Power says (01:40):
Well, I dunno. Are you dead?
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:40):
I don't think so.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:40):
Are you?
Paul.Power says (01:40):
It's an interesting philosophical conundrum
Paul.Power says (01:40):
But empirical evidence suggests "no"
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:40):
Phew. Good work, everyone.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:41):
And now, Sup. There's someone I'd like you to meet.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:41):
Your son...

Paul.Power
30 Nov 2008, 01:58
mattt has been added to the conversation.
Paul.Power says (01:41):
Great Scott! I'd never have believed it
mattt says (01:41):
inconcievable!
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:42):
is it... is it really you, son?
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:43):
He's just shy.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:44):
Either that or he's not your son. My sources can be a little shaky at times.
mattt says (01:45):
we'll get it tested
Paul.Power says (01:45):
No... hang on, there's a certain resemblence
Paul.Power says (01:45):
Look at the way they both fail to capitalise their sentences
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:45):
My god, you're right!
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:45):
my gawd, you're right!
Paul.Power says (01:46):
My Glod, I'm right!
mattt says (01:46):
my god, he's right
Paul.Power says (01:47):
And because dot Power was right, they all left
Paul.Power says (01:47):
To start new lives, in a world free of the menace of Netcorp!
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:47):
At least...
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:47):
...UNTIL NEXT TIME!!!
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:48):
*credits roll*
Paul.Power says (01:48):
Alternate ending:
Paul.Power says (01:48):
Paul.Power says (01:38):
Twenty seconds...
<SupSuper> Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants says (01:38):
fine, the code is Alpha Beta 666 Stuff
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:39):
He's alive, Super. And you can see him. If you just give peace a chance.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:39):
Oh, right. You did
mattt says (01:48):
[outtakes reel] my god, he's *hit in nuts with football*
Paul.Power says (01:48):
whoops, too late BOOM
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:49):
Alternate ending:
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:49):
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says:
And now, Sup. There's someone I'd like you to meet.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says:
Your son...
mattt says (01:49):
lmao
Munkee has been added to the conversation.
Paul.Power says (01:50):
Great Scott! I'd never have believed it
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:51):
inconcievable!
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:51):
Although... I already knew it.
mattt says (01:51):
is it... is it really you, son?
Munkee says (01:51):
this lao-shan isn't going to slay itself
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:52):
Guess not
mattt says (01:52):
alas
mattt says (01:52):
i'll find him someday
mattt says (01:52):
Where is my son. I'll find my son.
Munkee says (01:52):
Metal... Gear?
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:53):
I think Metal Gear's a type of beer. My contact must have dumped some kind of alcoholic on me.
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:53):
No, Munkee, you can't have any Metal Gear!
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:53):
No Metal Gear for you!
Munkee says (01:53):
alright, I'll kill Ocelot and clean my room
Paul.Power says (01:54):
You'll understand when we post the whole thing up in OD. Assuming that's the plan
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:55):
I didn't really have a plan. It just spiralled out of control.
Munkee says (01:55):
and the seas will run red with the blood of the disbelievers
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:55):
But do it!
Paul.Power says (01:55):
roger wilco
Mad Un' - http://turnus.wurmz.net says (01:56):
I don't know if wilco would appreciate that

Melon
30 Nov 2008, 02:04
*clap clap clap*
Bravo Sirs. A thrilling read.

SupSuper
30 Nov 2008, 02:15
FYI, none of us knew what was going on when we were invited in.

Worm Mad
30 Nov 2008, 02:33
Yeah, I just started a conversation with Paul like that and proceeded to add people when I thought it was appropriate. I also sent both Sup and Paul two different formula pictures.
Here's the one I sent Paul... (the first version had "LOL SPID'R" instead of "SPID'R" and 7 legs instead of 8)

Muzer
30 Nov 2008, 08:59
Tl; dr
Meh, I read it anyway, and yes, it is funny.

Akuryou13
30 Nov 2008, 14:08
that was awesome and I now love all of you :p

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